This week I have been pretty much thrust into the acceptance of my illness.  Even though I have read 20 or so books on self-improvement as well as self-healing and self-helping, herbals blends, eating whole raw organic foods. It all comes down to this, there is nothing you do that will help you until you accept all that is you.

There is no quick fix out there no matter how much you meditate, will it, want it, write it down, dream board it, make new years resolutions about it. I still had to accept and love all that makes me, me.

I found that all these self-help books lack one major thing, how the heck did the writer come to terms with what was going on in his/her life. Then (ding) the light comes on, and they have this fantastic epiphany.  They write about all that they suffered with, all the pain, all the hardships, but the writer failed to tell how they came to a sense of peace with all those things.  The story they tell is short sweet and to the point.  When did they accept themselves for who and what they are in all ways?? How did they find who they were and allow that to manifest?? How do we become comfortable in our own skin and own who we are?

I have this habit of skimming over the long tales of woe and skip to find the happy ending.  We all do it.  We want the fairy tale ending, the coming out of the dark place we are in and coming out on the other side bathed in light and perfect health.

When you see those, who have miraculously come to a state of divine knowledge.  I am thrilled with their findings, but I really would like to find my own way without the two weeks of watching or reading about their coming to Jesus moments. I want my own!

I  have gotten away from the self-help books.  I have now gone back to the enjoyment of reading, a good romance novel is a perfect pick me up. It has cut my stress level down considerably getting away from self-help books.

It is beautiful that those writers share their point of view, the opinions on how they reached their nirvana, but I have realized that I have to put in the work and then I find my state of acceptance.  I believe nirvana is your acceptance of who you are and being comfortable in your skin no matter where you are in life.

It is a circle of discovery for us all, there is no quick way to get from A to Z in record time.  Some of us will take a slow approach and come to our truth eventually, and there are others who will never get it until they die and find themselves on the other side.

Until then we will read the journey of others and get some basic ideas on how to go about finding and loving that deep and sometimes darker side of ourselves. Let those books, and videos only be a guide though.  When we allow what others think to become more important, we find our truth is harder to get to.

I will be among the many before me sharing my thoughts and my opinions.  I will share my thoughts and have those who feel and see themselves in my thoughts.  Yet when it is all said and done, my words will be my experiences, my loves, my illness hardships, my nirvana moments, my life.

Tell your story of yourself, it is lovely to look back and see the journey you have been on so far.

WWYHS